All the Single Ladies

Sometimes I struggle with being single. As you probably already know. Since when I do, I write about it here. Some people make fun of me for doing that. I can see where those people are coming from, but- don't care! So, I've reached a place where I think being single is fine and cool. I really like the place I'm at actually. I feel like I've arrived at some kind of really great milestone where I love, respect, and care about myself in a way I don't think I ever have before. But SOMETIMES.. singledom still sucks. Tonight I went to my cousin's wedding. I looked stupid. You know, one of those days where you hate everything- dumb hair, stupid make up, idiot outfit, etc. I didn't feel like drinking. Different things happened that made me feel like Bridget Jones. I was sitting at a table of all couples and my sis came around with her camera and said, "Okay can I get a picture of Kent and Susie?". Then, "Matt and Tiffany?". Next, "Mom and dad?". And, finally, inevitably- "Uh....Julie?" I growled internally at my beloved sister and outwardly declined to take a ridiculous picture by myself and my mom quickly offered to take one with me. Not a big deal right? Then the wedding party came out and the song that played was an obscure one that I associated with an ex. Blech. Next, my grandparent's wedding song played and all the couples in the family sped out to the dance floor. The feeling of love and romance was palpable as I remained glued to my seat. Later, the DJ announces it's time for Couple's Dance. Everyone went to the dance floor to dance to songs that I really like, but don't have anyone to dance with. And then it's time for all the single ladies to get out on the floor and catch the bouquet. Everyone at the table excitedly poked and prodded me, "Get out there!". My dad poked me on the arm to my right. My sis-in-law poked at my leg to my left. "You're single!!", people cried excitedly, like this awesome concept just dawned on them and hadn't been smashed cruelly in my face the entire evening. I sludged up to the dance floor with the very few other girls. Girls who were, by the way, GIRLS. Young ladies. Not in my age bracket. So, I left there feeling kind of like: Damn. You know what I mean? It's no one's fault and the wedding was lovely and I enjoyed seeing everyone that I love. I'm as happy as a clam for my beautiful cousin. Gorgeous, she was gorgeous- oh my God. Her dress was sooooo, so, so pretty. I wish my attitude hadn't been so lame and next wedding (since there are 4,000 this month alone) I'll be better prepared. To drink. Heavily. Just kidding....kind of.