Sunday, December 27, 2015

The Time I Car-Jacked Someone, Accidentally

I hope everyone enjoyed the warm holiday. I sure did and I'm excited for the New Year coming up and all the good things that BETTER happen or ELSE in 2016. Before departing from my parents house on Christmas to go to my boyfriend's family's get-togethers, a bit of concern was raised by my parents about my inability to just say normal things like a normal human-being and to think before I speak. Well I can't do that, even when I try very hard. Example: My boyfriend's father mentioned his mother's age and I let out a loud whistle. INAPPROPRIATE. The room got quiet and everyone looked at me. I was oblivious to my goober-y behavior, as per usual. Maybe that's something I can work on in the New Year. It's time now for a short story about another time I have behaved like a goober in the past. Grab your cup of hot cocoa and have a seat. One of my friends told me to meet her in the parking lot by an Outback Steakhouse. We were going to meet there and then go shopping for a couch at a furniture store nearby. I didn't have my glasses on because I hate wearing them. I just don't like things on my face. I guess I hate it more than I hate when someone I know waves at me and I don't see because I can't see and then that person feels puzzled. This story begins as I park in the mostly empty lot and soon someone drives up and parks next to me in a black car, much like the car of the friend I was meeting. Stupidly assuming my friend had arrived, I got out of my car and hopped into her's and started talking-- when suddenly I noticed THIS WAS NOT MY FRIEND. It was a terrified woman-stranger who was backed up against her door as far away from me as possible and she kept frantically glancing in the backseat. I turned around to see a baby in the car seat and stuttered, "Oh my God. I thought- wait, no, my friend-I thought-". I couldn't form the proper sentences to explain myself and she was so terrified of me that I just got out of her car immediately and, not knowing what else to do, got back into mine parked right next to her. I sat there while my face burned red and wondered if I was now going to go to prison. I didn't dare look over and I'm not sure what happened to her after that. I think they must've went into Outback. My friend showed up and I scurried into her car once I was very, very sure it was her and that's.. the end.

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